Believe it or not, I haven’t posted a recipe for soup for about 3 weeks. Now, that has got to be a first, at least for February, which in my estimation should actually be renamed Soupuary! I mean really, if Donald is bent on renaming mountains and bodies of water, why not let Donnie rename some of the months of the year too. Here are my suggestions. And remember, you read it here first!
January – Attackuary in honor of January 6th, 2021, and all the “patriots” who were recently pardoned who were only doing their civic duty by answering the call to action demanding an end to the “big steal”.
February – as stated above
March – MarchICE in honor of all the great “ICE” men and women.
BTW: U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) was formed to protect the United States by enforcing immigration laws and investigating crimes. ICE’s mission was to safeguard national security and public safety. However, the mission statement has changed. Past administrations have stated that ICE would mainly focus on criminals. But a key issue to watch is how the term “criminal” is now defined. White House spokeswoman Karoline Leavitt said this week that the administration sees all undocumented immigrants as “criminals”.
April – Apereal for all the fine men and women who respect the ideal that only white people have the intelligence and moxy to make America (uh-MER-uh-kuh) great again.
May – This month name will remain the same. But now defined as (May everyone who has ever questioned the wisdom and foresight of the new administration be smitten with the bird flu that originated in Biden’s basement!)
June – Junior in honor of Donald Jr. And what a great guy he turned out to be! Donald Trump Jr has described his father as “an artist with real estate”. And made the case for the Trump Organization and for his dad, that he was a “genius”. Of course, a month should be named after him! It’s getting harder and harder to get someone to lick your boots!
July – Julep instead of suggesting, “let them eat cake” as Marie Antoinette is attributed with responding when being told that her subjects had no bread, it would be more appropriate for the current administration to say instead – let them drink Juleps! Since like Marie, our current leader appears to be as oblivious to the poverty rate in our country, especially in some of our southern states, as she was. So, you’ all – drink up. There isn’t anything a good Julep can’t fix! (Except of course, pay the rent or put food on the table for your kids. But then, no problem, the kidlets will get food at school. Oops, no. Sorry, not anymore! Free lunches for children – cancelled!)
August – Donald will leave the name of this month unchanged. Because the meaning of “august” is respected and impressive. But now in the dictionary there will be a new synonym – worthy of being honored; entitled to honor and respect. adjective. of or befitting a lord. “of august lineage” synonyms: grand, lordly, Donald T.
September – Collapse since September is often referred to as fall, and the collapse or fall of democracy is the end goal of the present administration, it only makes sense to change the name to fit the reality!
October – Harvest a new name for this 10th month of the year to entice all of our hard living, employment hesitant, gun toting, cigarette smoking, high school dropouts, preferably with a felony count or two, a chance to be the very best farm workers ever. Because of course they have only been holding back from taking these jobs out of a sense of charity. But now, they will all be just excited as hell to take the place of undocumented workers and show them how a real true American man performs a job. Yeah team!
November – Thanks A big “thanks” to celebrate all the faithful people who voted for the present administration without using their brain. And we, the current leaders, are especially grateful to those of you who are well educated. Because if we can fool you, then the sky’s the limit. (Unless it’s sky owned by Elon!) So, forget what we promised during the presidential campaign. Forget that we plan to destroy democracy in the name of God. And guys, forget how we are diminishing the rights of your wife, daughter, mother, sister. How, by our actions, we are informing everyone of color, different religious beliefs, LGBT, etc. that we are the master race. Heil Elon! So, again, thanks for your unfounded and unequivocal support. You’ve made us what we are today.
December – Christ because every American must now profess to being a Christian. To tack up the 10 Commandments in every school room. And as Christians always supporting real inclusion and the importance of love, compassion, and helping others through our actions and words. And as Christians, showing love to our neighbors as ourselves. Or as Christians, welcoming all people into our churches, regardless of their background, beliefs, or differences. But really, surely Christ didn’t mean everyone! What Christ probably meant, was that as good Christians, we were allowed to pick and choose the commandments that meet our needs and beliefs. And to learn to love green Jello and tuna casserole.
Well, that pretty much sums up the whole year at a glance. And before you think I might be anti-Christian, let me be perfectly clear. I was raised in a Christian home. Although I don’t go to church any longer, I believe in being the best person I know how to be. And the real Christians I know, and love, are kind, compassionate, loving, and caring people. And yes, there is a difference between people who love the Lord, and those who give Christianity lip service. They may be fooling themselves, but they are not fooling me. Christ was not discriminatory. He loved everyone equally. And if any of what I have written, makes you mad. Good. Frequent another site.
And I know, Soupuary will never fly. Not political enough! But I don’t give a flying fig! I like it.
And I suppose before I let you go, I should say something about this soup. It’s easy to make, reasonably inexpensive, and mighty darn tasty. Enough said!
Peace and love to all.
2 T. extra virgin olive oil
1 T. unsalted butter
1 lg. onion, diced
2 med. carrots, diced
2 stalks celery, diced (plus leaves)
2 garlic cloves, minced
1 lg. smoked ham hock
½ tsp. dried thyme
1 lg. bay leaf (or 2 small)
½ tsp. seasoned salt
¼ tsp. celery salt
freshly ground black pepper
2 tsp. dried parsley
tiny pinch crushed red pepper flakes
8 c. veggie stock (I use 8 cups water and 6 tsp. Better Than Bouillon Veggie base)
1½ c. dried cannellini beans, rinsed and drained
4 c. chopped napa cabbage
1 T. fresh lemon juice
Heat the olive oil and butter in a large, covered soup pot or Dutch oven. Sauté the onion, carrots, and celery until the onion is soft. Add the garlic and cook for 1 minute.
Add the ham hock, thyme, bay leaf, seasoned salt, celery salt, black pepper, parsley, crushed red pepper flakes, veggie stock, and cannellini beans.
Bring to boil, reduce heat, cover, and simmer until beans are tender (about 2 hours).
Remove the lid and add the cabbage.
Cover the pot and continue to cook until the cabbage has softened, about 10 minutes. Add lemon juice, taste, and adjust seasoning.
Garlic bread makes for a nice side.